What is Mindfulness, and Why Do People Struggle With It?
Mindfulness can be life-changing, but also can be difficult to know where to start. In a world built on high-speed notifications and the relentless "grind" of graduate school or professional life, the idea of sitting still can feel like just another item on an impossible to-do list. Many of us find that our minds actually race faster the second we try to quiet them. We feel "unproductive," bored, or like we’re somehow doing it wrong. The goal isn’t to reach a state of perfection; rather, it's to build the muscle of awareness: presence, non-judgment, and the constant, gentle act of returning to the "now."
What is Mindfulness?
It’s a common myth that mindfulness means "thinking about nothing." In reality, it's more about how you think. Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, who pioneered the clinical use of mindfulness, defines it as: “the awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally” (Kabat-Zinn, 1994). It’s the choice to stay with your current experience, whether that’s the steam on your morning coffee or the frustration of a stalled train, without trying to fix it or beating yourself up for feeling it. Life passes us by constantly, and being mindfully in the moment can alter our perspective on many situations.
Be mindful of the "distraction slide" and our biological resistance
If you struggle to stay present, it’s not a character flaw; it’s biology. The brain has a "Default Mode Network" (DMN) that kicks in whenever we aren't focused on a task. This network is a time-traveler; it loves to ruminate on the past or panic about the future (National Institutes of Health [NIH], 2021). Our devices are designed to keep this network firing. The American Psychological Association (APA) notes that "constant checking of emails and social media is linked to higher stress levels" (APA, 2017). You don't have to live in a cave to be mindful—you just need to build a few "speed bumps" into your day:
Leave your phone in a different room for the first 10 minutes of your morning.
Try "single-tasking"—if you’re eating, just eat (no Netflix, no scrolling).
Practice a three-breath check-in before you respond to a stressful email. This can look like box breathing, listening to scenic white noises, and focusing on your breathing.
Prioritize "Micro-Mindfulness" (especially when the day feels like too much)
You don't need a meditation cushion or a 30-minute block of time to practice. Mindfulness is often most effective when integrated into the "cracks" of a busy schedule. Short, consistent bursts of awareness help rewire the brain's stress response. Try these "micro" moments:
The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding: Acknowledge 5 things you see, 4 you can touch, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, and 1 you can taste.
The Body Scan: A 60-second "inventory" from your scalp to your toes, simply noticing where you’re clenching your jaw or shrugging your shoulders (HHS, 2021).
The Transitions: Use a cue near you, for example, a slow elevator as your cue to take one long, deep breath in and out.
Recognize When it can be More
While most people find mindfulness challenging, some find it overwhelming. If you have a history of trauma or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), turning your attention inward can sometimes activate "hyperarousal" or intrusive memories (NIMH, n.d.). Similarly, those with ADHD may find traditional sitting meditation feels physically agitating. If mindfulness feels like it’s pushing you into a panic rather than grounding you, it’s important to pivot. Trauma-informed mindfulness or movement-based practices (like mindful walking or yoga) might be a much safer and more effective entry point.
When to reach out for help
Consider reaching out to a mental health clinician if:
Turning inward consistently triggers feelings of panic, flashbacks, or dissociation.
Your mind is dominated by intrusive, distressing thoughts you can't "observe" away.
You find yourself using "mindfulness" to avoid dealing with real-life problems or emotions (spiritual bypassing).
You feel "numb" or disconnected from your body and your surroundings most of the time.
Mindfulness is simply about improving your ability to be the person you already are—it's not about transforming into a different, more "peaceful" person. If your mind wanders during meditation, perhaps planning dinner or recalling an awkward moment from years ago, don't worry. That's just what brains do. The key achievement, the "win," is noticing that your mind has strayed. Be gentle with yourself; being present is a continuous practice, not a fixed goal, and you have every right to be a work in progress.
If you need help with mindfulness, reach out to us today and we can set you up with a clinician who incorporates mindfulness techniques to improve stress reduction, anxiety, and depression.
Resources and Citations
American Psychological Association (APA). (2017). Stress in America: Coping with Change. Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2017/technology-social-media
Kabat-Zinn, J. (1994). Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life. Hyperion.
National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). (n.d.). Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Retrieved from https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/post-traumatic-stress-disorder-ptsd
National Institutes of Health (NIH). (2021). Mindfulness for Your Health: The Science of Living in the Moment. NIH News in Health. Retrieved from https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2021/06/mindfulness-your-health
U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS). (2021). Mindfulness Matters. Retrieved from https://www.nih.gov/health-information/mindfulness-matters
Article written by: Sabrina Kalontarov